irresponsibility.

I just wrote a whole blog post about how I'm too responsible, but it didn't really pan out.  Basically, I wish I could party like these bitches.  Don't you wish, sometimes, that you were the type of person that partied all the time?  My mom thinks I am that person, but that's only because she has it good.  My older brother is the queen of responsibility.

Unfortunately, I have a weak stomach, so alcohol makes me fall asleep and/or throw up.  I'm a lot of fun at a party.  "Um, she got really loud for a bit, and then she fell asleep in my closet."  Hiwannadateme?  I also have been known to ride my bike after a whiskey too many, which leads to things like my currently scraped knee, and my kindest friend Wyatt freaking out a little bit.  (Just kidding, mom.  Like I would ever ride my bike after one whiskey too many.)  Luckily, I always wear a helmet.  See!?  Even in the depths of my irresponsibility, I wear protective headgear.

I am neurotically safe.  I live near an enormous lake, and I am not okay with my friends swimming after drinking, which obviously happens all the time.  I refuse to go outside in the sun without sunscreen.  I always wear my helmet when I bike, even when I'm riding to the bar.  I glare at everyone in flashbacks.  Gotta keep your guard up, people.

There isn't really a lesson here, people.  This ain't no morality play.  I think, this summer, my goal will be to become more irresponsible.  To achieve this goal, I plan to: go on dates with strangers, make friends with new people, drink in the out of doors, go camping for several days at a time near a lake, and get a tan.  You know.  Live a little, or whatever.

hipster party!  time to start condescending, and also stealing jokes.